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10 Workplace Rules You're Not Going to Like
Excelle Editor
Does sexism still exist in the workplace? Of course it does. But it’s no longer in the form of an unsolicited smack on the behind or blatant, belittling comment. Modern day sexism is less obvious, more subtle, harder to put your finger on. It’s also harder to fight.
In her blog post “Top 10 Uwritten Rules That Could Sabotage Your Career,” life coach and keynote speaker Ann Daly says “beyond laws and regulations and attitude is the deepest, most pervasive, most unconscious layer of our lives: culture … it’s the culture of patriarchy in which power and privilege accrue to the men.”
She goes on to talk about how this patriarchal culture manifests itself in the workplace, often in the most inconspicuous ways.
To that end, she put together a list of ten rules that apply to women in the workplace, whether or not they know it, like it, or deserve it (um, of course we don’t).
2. Looks matter
3. You won’t get sufficient feedback
4. A working mother’s commitment is assumed to be ambivalent
5. Actually, it is personal
6. Men are bred for self-confidence
7. Women are rendered invisible until they demonstrate otherwise
8. Women don’t take charge, they take care
9. Women are different
10. Women make great worker-bees, but visionary leaders—not so much.
And if you think about it, the prevalence of these rules isn’t so hard to believe. Ann says men will more often apply for jobs they aren’t 100% qualified for, an indicator of confidence (merited or not). She says women get shut out of the old boys’ club. And that your male boss may be reluctant to give you critical feedback (how else are you supposed to grow?).
But Daly is not without hope. She says that by knowing what we’re up against, women can begin to take their careers into their own hands. And by the looks of it, we’ve got our work cut out for us.
What do you think? Which unwritten rules do you think apply to
women in the workplace?
Join the discussion!
ymickas
3 months ago
4 comments
Like that will ever happen, Ebony Rose! I have had male and female supervisors and the women were more likely to powertrip then the guys. If you ask me, they are going about proving themselves the wrong way. When I hired in on my last job (b4 this one), I was asked what my weakness was and I replied, "I'm too compettive." By female boss said, "What is wrong with that; however a year later, she admonished me in front of my husband (who hired in at an identical posiion three months after I did), as he was presented an opportunity to which I was passed up--an opportunity which caused a major inconvenience for us as a family.
I say that the women who make it into white collar, supervisory positions should spend less time beating their chests for breaking the glass ceiling in their lives, less time power-tripping and more time trying to level the playing field for the rest of us. If this started happeing in the work place, it would send shock waves that would start changing things for the rest of this country.
Some people are starting to think that we are a third world country because cliques, nepotism and power trips are allowed to get in the way of hiing and promoting really tallented people to the appropriate positions.
tybro826
3 months ago
2 comments
If the men are supposed to have the power and the priviledge then the women are supposed to have the control and the validation/appreciation. So why are these "rules" still allowed even by a woman HR and woman manager whom can control the outcome of an out of place man and his comments. They could do this by not simply following the 'book' that hasnt been updated since before women could vote. I love men when they play fair and love me first. My question is if women are in their lives and workforces why are women not using the 'caring-learning' moments to their advantage to show the men another side of the story.
ElleEye
3 months ago
4 comments
<<>> When the men around here are focused and business oriented they get a pat on the back. When I'm focused on my work I'm treated like a b*!#. They want a *laugh* or *smile* or *comforting word* from me and I'm not ready with it because my head is buried in the large pile of all the administrative/accounting/HR/purchasing/marketing duties of the company. My job description does not include Mother but it seems to confuse the men around here that I'm not ready to validate, patronize, and comfort at the drop of a hat.
brookmole
3 months ago
14 comments
I experienced just this-in that if I didn't let a particularly offensive, controlling, passive aggressive co-worker (who is actually about 3 rungs below me in job title) run over me, I was seen as an aggressor by standing my ground. The same person has treated other people (always women) the same way, and one was told by the HR director (a woman) they should 'kiss and make up." The nerve!
EbonyRose
3 months ago
38 comments
I agree with #1, #2, #4, #7 and #10 - in my workplace, some of these "rules" are continually perpetuated by OTHER WOMEN! Such a shame that in a supposedly "enlightened" society, we still have mess like this going on.
So a great folllow-up article would be tips for overcoming these unwritten rules...how about it?